Wednesday, April 22, 2009


The sun is out and shinning today after a couple of days of rain.  It seems as though God mourned with us and is now giving us hope and comfort.  After a goodnights sleep I woke up feeling just a bit more at peace.  I know that I miss him like crazy but I also know that we will heal.  I am someone who needs to totally talk these things out so I have decided to start really sharing my feelings in my posts to help me heal and continue to stay present.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Sad Day

Yesterday was such a roller coaster of emotions. That morning we started to feel tons better about Ozzie because his kidney levels had returned to normal. So we thought that this was great news and that he just needed to recover from a possible infection. The doc on thought thought that there was a possible obstruction that may have cause his decline in health and that maybe it passed. If it hadn't passed though he would probably need surgery.

After much talking Joel and I both agreed that if he did have an obstruction that surgery was not the best option for quality of life for Ozzie. They talked about alot of different things through out the day with our local vet. Many hard conversations were had.

We decide that they should recheck an x-ray and see what was up. If he was still obstructed it would be time to let him go. If it was not obstructed and things looked well we would formulate a plan to try one or two more things. If those didn't work it was also his way of saying no more.

We got a call from the Emergency clinic around 6ish. It was a new vet who had not seen him but studied his charts, x-rays, and talked with many people who had dealt with Ozzie over the previous 48 hours. She told us that the orginal spot that they thought that there was an obstruction was clear now. However they did see some bunching of the intestines that were not right. It wasn't definitive but he was not doing well and he had not gotten better at all with anything they were trying. He was still vomiting and had Diarrhea both with blood in it. Also his temp would not come down at all. She also said he did not look good and felt that we really needed to come and see him for our own eyes. In her opinion there was a very high chance that he had Intestinal Lymphoma, or some other big issue. I knew she was saying what I was thinking. Ozzie was telling us it was time.

We rushed to Grand Rapids and we all spent some time with him and said our goodbyes. He was happy to see us and purred the entire time but he was not our Ozzie at all. His eyes said it all... it was time and he was ok with it. I could tell he was in pain and he was still having the bloody diarrhea as we were there. He also felt very warm after he crawled into my arms after my parents took the kids to Wendys. The doctor and the tech both confirmed that he was very sick and there wasn't much to do and we were making the right choice. I gave him once last hug and kiss and left the room. Joel stayed with him and he purred right till the end, was not scared, and went very peacefully.

He will be so missed and as I sit here and type this from the love seat I miss his warm body next to mine. I know it's gonna take time before I stop looking for him to walk around the corner, curl up in my lap, or even to be busy cleaning Louie. However I do know that he truly changed my life. He was my first ever cat and now I can not ever imagine a time in my life without a cat in our house. He loved us so much and always showed us. He knew our emotions and was often a comforter in times of sadness.

Sir Oswald may you be pain free and floating on clouds of catnip!!!

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Ozzie Update

Well we are still not sure 100% what is wrong as he is still not well enough to come home.  They are hoping that once the high protein levels leave his body he will start to feel better.  Otherwise he might need to transfer to our local vet for a bit more care.  I really miss having him here that is for sure.  He is such a huge part of our life.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Long Day

My morning started off super early. My dog was running around the room followed by hissing because one of our cats got into our room at 4:30am. My hubby thought he chased the cat out because our cat Ozzie was in the hallway and he is never there. So I am almost asleep and I hear something in the room again. Well apparently the cat that was in our room was a different one. So I got him out of the room and used the bathroom. Well by this time my mind was on and running a mile a min because I had a busy day ahead. I was going to help run a Consigment Sale for my MOPS group, fit in Maddie first ever soccer game, and have the girls go to Lansing for their first overnight with my MIL. So I got up instead of turning in bed and getting antsy.

I thought I'll just lay on the couch and veg for an hour before I needed to shower and get on the road. Well my cat Ozzie was still in our hallway and I knew something seemed off he only ever hangs out there if a mess from another cat needs to be cleaned up or something else is wrong. It's his way of getting our attention. So I tried to pet him and love on him and he was not having it. Normally all I have to do is say his name and he'll purr and run to you. Not this time...I let Joel know to keep an eye on him and then also found a slimy puke with a blood tinge downstairs so I knew he wasn't doing well.

I left at 6:30am to go work the sale and came home around 11:30am to take Maddie to her game. We went to her game and then came home. I went to change and found him upstairs looking horrible and puking more and not even cleaning himself up. So off I ran him to the emergency vet in GR while Joel took the girls to Ionia to meet my MIL.

$918 later he is in early kidney failure of one kidney and also has some ulcers from the kidney issue. He is there till sometime tomorrow with IV fluids and antibiotics with hopes that he'll be able to come home and do well for a while on a special food diet. We will know more tomorrow though. There is only so much we want to do for quality of life. Alot of times these cats end up needing weekly-daily IV fluids to keep them healthy and that is not for us or our Ozzie.

On a good note I made well over $200 at the Consignment sale so that should help with the bill for sure!!!

Friday, April 10, 2009

It’s Friday, But Sunday’s Coming…

The best message of all time for Good Friday is by Author and Speaker Dr. Tony Campolo. Here is a link to the famous MP3 and you can also download it here .


The whole tape is great but the best part is at the end when Tony Campolo recalls one Sunday when he had a little preaching competition with the head pastor at the church where he attends.

Dr. Campolo tells how he preached the perfect sermon in every way and had taken the congregation to ‘the heights of glory’. As he sat down beside his pastor, Dr. Tony patted him on the knee and simply said, “Top that.” The older black pastor looked at him and said, “Boy, watch the master.” Then Dr. Campolo recalls for us the very brilliant message which followed.

The following is a short printed version of the 45 minute sermon–the printed version doesn’t really do justice to the original, but you can at least get an idea what the last part is like:

It’s Friday. But Sunday’s coming—

It was a simple sermon, starting softly, building in volume and intensity until the entire congregation was completely involved, repeating the phrases in unison. The sermon went something like this.

It’s Friday. Jesus is arrested in the garden where He was praying. But Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. The disciples are hiding and Peter’s denying that he knows the Lord. But Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. Jesus is standing before the high priest of Israel, silent as a lamb before the slaughter. But Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. Jesus is beaten, mocked, and spit upon. But Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. Those Roman soldiers are flogging our Lord with a leather scourge that has bits of bones and glass and metal, tearing at his flesh. But Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. The Son of man stands firm as they press the crown of thorns down into his brow. But Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. See Him walking to Calvary, the blood dripping from His body. See the cross crashing down on His back as He stumbles beneath the load. It’s Friday; but Sunday’s a coming.

It’s Friday. See those Roman soldiers driving the nails into the feet and hands of my Lord. Hear my Jesus cry, “Father, forgive them.” It’s Friday; but Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. Jesus is hanging on the cross, bloody and dying. But Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. The sky grows dark, the earth begins to tremble, and He who knew no sin became sin for us. Holy God who will not abide with sin pours out His wrath on that perfect sacrificial lamb who cries out, “My God, My God. Why hast thou forsaken me?” What a horrible cry. But Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. And at the moment of Jesus’ death, the veil of the Temple that separates sinful man from Holy God was torn from the top to the bottom because Sunday’s coming.

It’s Friday. Jesus is hanging on the cross, heaven is weeping and hell is partying. But that’s because it’s Friday, and they don’t know it, but Sunday’s a coming.

And on that horrible day 2000 years ago, Jesus the Christ, the Lord of glory, the only begotten Son of God, the only perfect man died on the cross of Calvary. Satan thought that he had won the victory. Surely he had destroyed the Son of God. Finally he had disproved the prophecy God had uttered in the Garden and the one who was to crush his head had been destroyed. But that was Friday.

Now it’s Sunday. And just about dawn on that first day of the week, there was a great earthquake. But that wasn’t the only thing that was shaking because now it’s Sunday. And the angel of the Lord is coming down out of heaven and rolling the stone away from the door of the tomb. Yes, it’s Sunday, and the angel of the Lord is sitting on that stone and the guards posted at the tomb to keep the body from disappearing were shaking in their boots because it’s Sunday, and the lamb that was silent before the slaughter is now the resurrected lion from the tribe of Judah, for He is not here, the angel says. He is risen indeed.

It’s Sunday, and the crucified and resurrected Christ has defeated death, hell, sin and the grave. It’s Sunday. And now everything has changed. It’s the age of grace, God’s grace poured out on all who would look to that crucified lamb of Calvary. Grace freely given to all who would believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross of Calvary was buried and rose again. All because it’s Sunday.

At the end of the message the pastor shouts out:

It’s Friiidaaaay!

And the whole congregation responds:

But Sunday’s Coming!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Happy Birthday Allie

My little Bear Bear is 4 years old today!!!  No way I can hardly believe my little April Fools Joke turned 4 today. I can not believe how big she has gotten and how much she has changed. Allie was our quiet little sweet girl and now she is the little Doddle Bear marker Makeup artist. (See posts a few back understand better ) She even asked if she could start getting homework now that she is 4! She is such a joy and handful all at the same time.  I love you my sweet little Bear Bear!!!!